Sunday, July 26, 2009

Bowling Success – It’s All in the Leg Kick

I went bowling with some colleagues last week, and my friend Dennis shot this grainy video of me throwing the ball down the lane. As far as I know, this is the only video in existence depicting The Mill in the throes of bowling. It’s a lot like the famous Patterson-Gimlin film of Bigfoot – shot on a handheld 16 mm camera in 1967. Yes, that’s the one where something that looks a hell of a lot like a guy in a big gorilla suit walks through the woods, and everyone thought it was Bigfoot.

In other words, I’m the Sasquatch of bowling.

Be that as it may, my modus operandi – when it comes to bowling – is all style and ver y little substance or skill. I’ve worked hard to appear as if I know what I’m doing. And even though my single game scores typically range from 80 to 120, I possess a highly stylized motion that includes a stutter step, a fluid arm motion, and an over-exaggerated leg kick that has likely caused irreparable cartilage damage to my left hip. Bowling is a tough sport, after all.

My real problem is severe inconsistency, and a complete lack of desire to practice or get any better. I can work on the leg kick in the shower, or at the dance club. And as long as I have that, that’s good enough for me.

Cue the video tape:

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JG said...

Much like Obama throwing the first pitch, as captured by Fox, this video fails to provide the outcome of such throw. How many pins???

The Mill said...

Don't remember. Maybe I picked up a spare? The fist pump is the only clue, and I only do that when something reasonably good happens.